I love a good plan.
Everything in me loves to know what to expect. To have a good idea already in my head. To prepare and figure things out in advance because then I can just lean on that plan when I’m in the moment, no thinking required in those moments when I find it hard or even “impossible” to think and function. A time of weakness for me.
But I’m realizing that a lot of the time the Lord doesn’t like us to use our own plans that we’ve created in advance for ourselves. Haha 🙂
Lately the Lord has been working on me when it comes to…
I find safety in making plans, but I am finding that the Lord wants me to make Him my safe place, my fortress, my Help…. not my own plans that I’ve created in advance to lean on.
I was in a situation yesterday where I didn’t know exactly what to expect, and I found myself trying and trying to make a plan in my head so that I could function. I tried so hard to form a plan that it led me to frustration when it wouldn’t form! I found it so hard to just go with it… to just see what unfolds and hear Him in the moment when I needed to know. I’ll be honest too, it really scrambled me up! My mind was literally scrambled as I focused more on wanting to make a plan than waiting on the Lord to show me what I needed to know or to hear what I needed to hear, or to see what I needed to see in the moment.
You know, my dependency on a “plan” almost messed everything up and almost knocked me down. It was one of those times when I could either realize that it was not the time to make a plan and trust in the Lord to give me what I needed in the moment, or I could just let myself and everything just fall apart and crumble. Thankfully it didn’t crumble, and I realized what I was doing before it was too late, but man it showed me some things about myself and my thinking that the Lord is wanting to knock down and take me through.
The Lord’s plans are better than mine. He’s got my back. I can lean on Him.
I know I can follow Him down this “adventurous trail” and trust that when I let go (I find myself gritting my teeth as I type this! Good grief, the stubbornness!) and just follow attentively, He will give me exactly what I need to take each step I need to take.