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10.20.18 – “Who do you think you are?”

“Who do you think you are?”

I woke up with this question in my head.

Typically when I hear that particular phrase I hear it with a, “Who do you think you are???” in a kind of threatening tone. Like whoever it’s directed towards must be an arrogant jerk who has just done something obnoxious. Think of how one of the Three Stooges would say it.

But I heard it again and again in my head and I tried to clear away how I usually perceive that phrase to be said.

“Who do you think you are?”

Okay, let’s ask that question.

Who do I think I am? What are my thoughts about who I am?

Are they good thoughts, are they bad?

Do those thoughts limit me? Do they empower me to do whatever I am led to do or do they automatically shut me down?

Do the thoughts I have about who I am help to drive me forward or do they hold me back?

Do they push me down, not even giving myself a chance to grow?

Then I go to this question…

What are the Lord’s thoughts about me?

“For I know the thoughts I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” – Jeremiah 29:11

Thoughts to give me a future and a hope… He is rooting for me as my Father and thinks good thoughts about me! He is for me and He says I can do all things through Christ!

“Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will …”

-Ephesians 1:4-5

I am chosen! He chooses me. (Why is that even hard for me to type using the word, “me” in there?)

Have you ever been in PE class in school and they are choosing people for the teams… Well I was one who always assumed I would NOT be chosen. I thought myself clumsy, unqualified, not really competitive when it comes to sports, and well, I usually was one of the last ones chosen – I thought of myself as not really wanted or needed. Not important. How I thought I didn’t matter. I thought I could slip away and not even be missed — oh I tried it too.

Well, the Creator of the universe chooses ME. He chooses YOU. He has big ideas for us –assignments. How easy is it to develop a mindset that will keep me tucked away and unusable because I deem myself unfit and incapable. That’s not agreeing with God.

The Lord is so convicting me of this today, but in the most tender, loving way. Being a highly sensitive kind of person, I sometimes respond to instruction as criticism and I use it as an opportunity to kick myself real good a few times. I love how my Father knows me so well and shows me things in ways I can receive and digest.

“Look at the birds of the air: They do not sow or reap or gather into barns–and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” – Matthew 6:26

I am valuable to Him!

As I read these things and proclaim them, I almost begin to feel a twinge of “eh… not really. Sounds nice though, doesn’t it?” and I realize just how deep my insecurities are.

It’s kind of like being “stuck” in a caged box that I’ve built for myself. The thing is, I have been given the key to let myself out of this caged box. I can let myself out.

How much more can the Lord use me if I quit placing limitations on myself? By limiting myself, I am limiting God.

They say, “Be confident!”

…I’ve always thought, “Yea, that would be great! –But how?”

I think the Lord is taking me through that now, He’s teaching me about who He has created me to be, but so little by little –like a journey. Going from insecure to confident doesn’t happen overnight, at least it’s not happening that way for me. God is worth the adventure of the journey though. He is so full of surprises, but they are good. He is for us! I’m excited to discover more and more of who I am in this journey that I am taking with Him.

–Heather

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