This morning I am starting this post from a place of struggle, but I have a feeling by the time I am finished here, by the end I’ll be in a different place.
I woke up in a strange frame of mind, still sleepy and lethargic, immediately wanting to bash myself and condemn myself over something I felt I did wrong yesterday.
It’s one thing to own something and take it to the Lord, ask forgiveness, repent, but moving on after that is key. I can’t stay there stuck in the mud.
I couldn’t get to my spot at the table quick enough, I know that just a little bit of time sitting with the Lord and talking it though with Him, focusing instead on Him and not me and my little mess would fix this. It would be all I need in order to push past this.
So I’m sitting here, trying to reign in my mind, bring it into focus. Struggling so much with that, I keep wanting to go to where I’ve done wrong, but in the moment I stopped and thought about Jesus, in the moment I finally was able to focus my thoughts to realize that I’m sitting here with my Father, knowing that He has already forgiven me, He’s not concerned about it anymore, He’s ready to continue forward, He’s excited about my life. He’s cheering me on… “Let’s go!”
…then suddenly it all hits me like a wave. Figuratively and literally.
All is washed away, all is renewed.
I am now where I need to be to start this day.
And I’m just so thankful. And I am reminded that sometimes tears are a really, really good thing that God uses to wash and renew us from within.
I had a feeling I’d be in a better place by the end of this journal post. “Renewed” is a great place to start the day. He is good.