What I am going to write about, I will tell you is me stepping outside of my comfort zone.
Speaking of comfort….
I am going to be completely open about my experience today, because for some reason I feel that I am to document it so that I can remember it within my journey.
Before I continue, I want to say that over the last few months especially, I have been growing closer with the Holy Spirit as a teacher, as a friend, as my Help, as many things.
You may have read some of my posts previously where I have mentioned my view and perception of Holy Spirit over the years. How for a long time I didn’t really see Him as someone that I could so interact with in a real way, other than just having a sense of being led in my life decisions. For a long time, I didn’t understand His purpose in my life in a practical way.
I repented of keeping Him at arms length a little while back, and told Him that I wanted to be closer with Him, even though I had a fear of that kind of intimacy –or what He might choose to do. But I asked Him to help me to break through that. Since then, I’ve been growing closer and closer with Him as that wall of fear and stubbornness is being demolished.
Usually for me, I will know He is there just from a knowing, a sense of His presence, or I’ll suddenly feel that I need to weep because of a sort of fullness that I don’t understand and I feel a need to let it out. I’ll be so moved, and I’ll sense that He’s there. Sometimes I’ll get chills.
But today was different, and even as I type right now I can still sense it.
I am usually very sensitive in general and can notice slight differences. This morning I know that something is different.
So what is it that I am talking about?
A strange warmth, a sense that I have a blanket over my back, but there is no blanket there.
It’s like this warm blanket over my back, I can feel the slight weight of it, and yet physically there’s nothing there.
It’s enough that I could try and shake it off if I wanted to, if I decided that it’s too out of my comfort zone to go there, but enough that I have to notice that it’s there. I had to make the decision of whether or not to ask Him about it and dig into it further, to accept that this was real, and so I decided to ask Him.
So I asked Him,
“Lord, what is this? Will You show me what You are wanting me to know?”
Then I had a faith and I knew that when I would open my bible that He would show me.
So I opened it up, and I came to a place I had underlined in Daniel. I zeroed in on this,
“O Daniel, I have now come forth to give you skill to understand.”
And then the next part I had underlined was,
“…for you are greatly beloved.”
And this is exactly what the Holy Spirit does, He gives us understanding and helps us to experience the Father’s love!
Here is the whole passage from that section, Daniel 9:22-23,
“And he informed me, and talked with me, and said, “O Daniel, I have now come forth to give you skill to understand. At the beginning of your supplications the command went out, and I have come to tell you, for you are greatly beloved…”
So, today all I felt I needed to do was to document this. Why? I don’t know exactly, but I do know that I feel that I experienced the Holy Spirit in a new and interesting way today. It was one of comfort and one of love, and one of greater understanding.
Thank you Holy Spirit, for helping me to burst down the walls between us, to resist the urge to run from the “discomfort”, which has led me into the ultimate “comfort” of Your presence in a new and real way. In the sweetest way.