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8.27.19 – It was in His heart all along…

So I’ve had this art piece that was made for me, by my maternal grandfather. He said it was “me” in this picture. I’ve only met him like once when I was a little baby, so I don’t really know him. I don’t know much about him other than what I’ve heard over the years, though I remember that he used to write me a bunch of letters as a child.

I think it was last year that I remembered there was an art piece that he made for me when I was a young girl.

This piece has been at my parents house for years, and the Lord brought it to mind one day, and so I found it, and I took it home with me so that I could see what the Lord might want to show me through it. So I brought it home, and I’ve kept it in my drawer at my dining room table where I sit each morning.

Well, just the other day, I was led to opening up the drawer and pulling that art piece out again. The Lord has been showing me new things as I look at it, and into it.

Here is the main thing He’s been showing me, and really just reminding me of and emphasizing

This was His plan for me, all along. This was in His heart all along…

Even before I longed for a closeness with Him, long before He began teaching me about living a lifestyle of prayer, loooooong before I knew much of anything about the Holy Spirit…. God had this in mind for my life.

The Lord knew one day I would look at this art piece differently, with new eyes, and be able to see that it’s His heart for me, and who I am made to become, and who I was created to be all along. He was getting me “there”, I just didn’t know it yet. And who knows what He still has up His sleeve. Isn’t He just wonderful with all of His good surprises?

Isn’t that so wonderful of the Lord to do this for me, to have this planned for me to see one day, to know that He was thinking about me all along? Thank You, Father.

Up until just a few years ago, I wasn’t able to really begin see God as a “Father” – as my Father. Maybe for others, but not really in my own life.

Up until that point in my life, I saw Him as a “scary, intimidating God.” I felt I wasn’t worthy to talk with Him, I felt He wasn’t proud of me, that He was disappointed in me…I didn’t know how to come to Him, and I was honestly afraid of Him, tip-toed around Him, looked over my shoulder for Him out of the corner of my eye with a sense of dread.

I honestly dreaded the thought of meeting face-to-face one day because I was terrified of facing Him. My thinking of Him was that distorted. It was torture.

Isn’t that just awful? I was always so ashamed to admit it, but I didn’t know how to see any differently all those years.

I am discovering now, that He is wanting to teach me how to be very close with Him, as my Heavenly Father. He has been teaching me how to be close with Him. And He’s showing me who He is, in the most loving and tender way – in a healing way. He’s letting me see and understand parts of His character that absolutely melt me. He’s absolutely wonderful.

You see, He’s taking me from the opposite of what I was. He’s taking me from the way I saw Him back then, which was the opposite of the truth of who He really is, it was the complete opposite of how He wants my relationship with Him to be. He’s helping me to see who He truly is, and that He loved me all along, through all of that misunderstanding in my heart and mind. He loved me all along, He was with me all along.

I just wanted to tell you about what He’s doing, because it’s so wonderful, and I’m so grateful.

He doesn’t have to do this, you know. But He does, and He wants to, and He takes great pleasure in teaching me about Him being my Heavenly Father, and how to just “be” His daughter. ?From that, all that He has for me to do, will come.

But do you know a huge part of why it’s so important that I’m able to see God in a healthy, accurate way? So that I can come to my Father to pray for others — for His will to be done.

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven…”

-Heather ?

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