Who am I when no one is looking? When no one else but the Lord can see…

How will I react in the moment of that sting of disappointment?

Or that moment when fear swoops in?

Will I choose to grumble over the inconvenience?

Will self-centeredness rise to the surface?

Will selfishness kick in?

“What’s hiding in there, Lord?”

(situation happens, “ugly” thing suddenly rises to the surface)

“Oh…. yikes…. I see it now, Lord. I don’t like this thing that’s been in there. Ugh, I’m sorry, Lord. I sure am glad You saw that. I sure am glad You brought it to my attention. Will You help me? Will You lead me through the transformation that only You can do?”

I believe the Lord gives us opportunity to learn, and to be trained in the small things, the situations that maybe aren’t quite as significant in our lives as others down the line could be.

That we may learn these lessons so that as the real test comes, as the real deal circumstance comes our way, as our “colors come through” in that moment, because of the transformation work that He’s already taken us through, we’ll be able to make the right decision, we’ll be able and ready and prepared to have the right reaction.

I would love to let you assume the best about me, that of course I’d do “the right thing” and have the “right reaction” …we all want to think that we would, don’t we?

But I can tell you this, right now the Lord is taking me through these times of testing, and I don’t always like what comes to the surface. I don’t always like my default reaction.

But I can have hope, knowing, that He’s always doing a work in me. I don’t need to worry, or ever feel hopeless about myself, because He has promised to perfect the work He’s wanting to do in me — I just have to keep choosing Him, and choosing His way, keeping my heart open before Him, and allowing these lessons to do that perfecting, transformative work within me.

Father, thank You for seeing these things in me and loving me enough to help me work through them so that I am prepared for what this life brings my way. I want to be rid of my old nature, my old ways of thinking, my old reactions, and I want to live as transformed and brand new.

Thank You for allowing me to see and experience my “colors.” You surface the ones that are “dead and dull” and then You breathe new life into them…

…transforming the dull colors into ones that are vibrant, deep, and rich in Your “true colors.” ?

-Heather ?