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2:22 AM this morning…

I woke up, wide awake— around 2:22 AM this morning…

…and I couldn’t go back to sleep.

I immediately thought of this verse when I looked at the time…

He reveals deep and secret things; He knows what is in the darkness, And light dwells with Him.“—Daniel 2:22

…and I was drawn to go sit at the table, so that I could talk with the Lord about a few things that were weighing on my heart. 💔

You see, I went to sleep realizing an area within my heart, that I needed to address and repent of.

It was troubling me.

I went to sleep realizing this area within my heart, this place in my heart and mind that needs to be changed by the One and ONLY who can transform.

And I believe He woke me up to take care of some things.

After I confessed, He led me into Romans… “6:19

“Because of the weakness of your human nature, I am using the illustration of slavery to help you understand all this. Previously, you let yourselves be slaves to impurity and lawlessness, which led ever deeper into sin. Now you must give yourselves to be slaves to righteous living so that you will become holy.”—Romans 6:19 NLT

“I am using a human analogy because of the weakness of your flesh. For just as you offered the parts of yourselves as slaves to impurity, and to greater and greater lawlessness, so now offer them as slaves to righteousness, which results in sanctification.” (Romans 6:19 CSB)

Shortly after, I was able to go back to sleep…

But this morning,

I am processing through a few things,

going a little deeper,

and listening for God’s heart on the whole thing.

Why He leads me to write about such personal things on here, I do not understand fully, but somehow, I find great joy in it. 💖


Last night, I recall saying to the Lord…

“God, why is this thing trying to rise back up in me? I thought I dealt with it for good? I thought it was all gone? And yet… here again, I’ve discovered this ugly thing within my heart, and this way of thinking, this perspective within my mind….”

It’s best to just be honest with Him, you know?

It’s best to admit things to God, to look at things for what they really are, to face them head-on—with Him right there with us, of course. It’s much safer that way, because His loving presence protects us from going into condemnation.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”—1 John 1:9

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”—Romans 8:1

And I’m dwelling on a POWERFUL truth this morning…

He doesn’t just “cover” our sins… He REMOVES them!

He CLEANSES us!

He PURIFIES us!

He SANCTIFIES us, that we may be set apart to glorify Him!

“But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”—1 John 1:7-9

And sometimes after we confess, after we repent… there is still a process that He will take us through.

…sometimes we’ll still feel the “pain” for a little while. The process of His transformation isn’t always quick and easy.

And as I felt some of this “left over pain” this morning… I recalled a passage from a teaching message I was listening to yesterday:

“…the turmoil that happens in our lives is because these things in us that God is wanting to get rid of, and every time we’re about to go to the next, higher level…I guarantee you… you will find things come ‘alive’ that you thought you had conquered. WHY? Because He’s going deeper into you to kill things that would harm you at the next level… He always deals with weaknesses inside of us before He promotes us, so that when the promotion comes, the weakness doesn’t kill us…. Because you get killed in the ‘Holy Place’ for what you get away with in the ‘Outer Courtyard.”—John Paul Jackson, from Maximizing Heaven’s Help teaching

WOW.

And he went further on to say…

“…He will promote us AFTER He has healed things that could harm us… it’s His mercy. It’s His mercy to heal that which could harm us, BEFORE He promotes us.”

Wow. wow. wow.

And so I’m realizing, and I’m learning…(because I’m IN this right now, I’m LIVING this)…

We must welcome Him do His work within our hearts—not attempting to push ahead of Him, not attempting to rush through the way He choses to do the work...

…not attempting to bypass the way He chooses

to process us,

to protect us,

to purify us,

and later

to promote us. ☀️

Oh, Father. Thank You. 💘🌱☀️

For judgment comes not from east or from west,
    not from the wilderness or the mountains,
But from God who decides,
    who brings some low and raises others high.
“—Psalm 75:7-8

So humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time.“—1 Peter 5-6

A thief comes only to steal and slaughter and destroy; I came so that they might have Life and have it more abundantly.“—John 10:10

…the Law of the Lord is his joy;
    and on His Law he meditates day and night.
He is like a tree
    planted near streams of water,
    that yields its fruit in season;
Its leaves never wither;
    whatever he does prospers.
“—Psalm 1:1-3

-Heather 🌺

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