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2.12.2022 – I love writing, but…

I think I’m processing through life a little differently these days…

So much of what I’ve written about on this blog, so far, has been my journey of processing through pain

fear

anxiety

uncertainty

challenges

insecurities

honest struggles

Perhaps the over-abundance of words has come from all the years and years of these kinds of things piling up.

Perhaps part of the abundance of words have come from the unraveling, the process of healing before my Heavenly Father.

This daily journal journey, since about 2018, has come from journeying into a place of learning what it means to LIVE this life, within the place of abiding in Christ, and not just hiding from everything in attempt of self-preservation.

This way of “self-preservation” or “self-protection” can be a “default” of mine, something I’m always trying to recognize and do away with.

And of course I’m still learning the way through this, I always will be learning.

But if I’m real, over the last couple of months— I think around the time the donkeys and the bull calf came to live here with us— my mornings and my “inspiration” has changed, very quickly.

I’ll be honest—it scares me sometimes.

Because I’ve been so used to the words just overflowing every morning.

And I have LOVED writing.

And I do love writing.

But these days, the words aren’t so always so “abundantly” there.

And it’s funny how my website is giving me issues lately, the words type so sluggishly, and slowly onto the page. I’ll type a sentence and the delay is like wading through water.

Probably a simple update I need to do, but still frustrating.

I’ll look into it. 🙄🙃

But God is the one who led me into this blog, and into a passion for writing, and so I have to trust that He is leading me still, even now, even within “this”—whatever “this” season is.

Is the time of daily writing over for me?

I do not know.

It might be,

or it might just be changing a little bit.

We’ll see. ☀️

Perhaps “this” is just another challenge that I am facing in this different kind of place.

Perhaps it’s another “challenge” that I’ll write about as I face it,

right here before God,

and right here with you.

Thank You, Father. 💝

-Heather 🌺

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